As I reflect on my life and I rewind back to my early 30s and look at some of my past experiences and how they stretched me and pushed me to act on things differently. I wonder how I would have approached life back then with what I know now.
I’d like to share with the ladies out there in their late 20s and 30s a little bit about my learnings from the journey so far and what female experience means for me.
Master the Art of Loving yourself
If I had embraced myself entirely (the good and bad parts) at a younger age, I would have saved myself ten years of pain. When you love every bit of yourself, you are then able to love and accept others for who they are and build stronger and healthier relationships.
Refuse to play the perfection game – it’s exhausting!
During the toughest times of my life, I covered my face with a wonder woman mask hiding the pain the bad and the ugly. Only a couple of friends knew how broken I was. When you start being authentic and show your vulnerability your ups, downs and struggles people can relate to you, you become more trustworthy and sincere to others.
You matter, stop putting yourself last
It took me years to stop taking care of everyone and start looking after myself. Back then I had no time for myself, not only it made my life harder, but I also ended resenting my loved ones. My motives were wrong; they were an escape, a way to avoid looking at the emptiness of my life. Ladies, it’s impossible to make everyone happy – decide for yourself instead of others, and your life will become a smooth ride.
Cultivate Honourable Relationships
It can be hard to get away from negative people if they are colleagues or loved ones. But you can choose who you spend time with. If you are in a relationship where the person is a taker and not a giver, it’s time to open your eyes, reassess that relationship and decide if it is healthy for you to be a part of it. Draw a line and gradually distance yourself. Setting boundaries with people you don’t want to deal with every day makes your life easier because they cannot affect you any longer.
Chill out, stop all that fuss and worry
All that worry triggers stress, anxiety and makes you feel miserable plus it will not change your outcome. Let go and accept what’s going to happen to you. You will realise you will be okay no matter what. Once I stopped worrying about everything and anything, my stress level went from a ten to a zero.
Keep the Fun alive
Stay inspired by what makes you feel passionate. Try and test new things, meet new people, fill your life with things and activities that are enjoyable and makes you feel happy free and sexy.
Celebrate your enoughness
Ok, she has 3 km long legs or a guitar shaped booty, so what?
Sometimes I think we should stop looking at magazines or the Kardashians butts. Comparing your life to someone’s life on the tabloids is detrimental, it affects your self-worth, self-image and confidence. There is always going to be someone smarter, prettier or better off than you just accept that. Instead of comparing try to be thankful for your life, for being alive and able to do what you do and keep moving forward.
“Expectation leads to a lot of frustration.”
I know I know we’ve all been through the Cinderella, prince charming ever after Bla Bla Bla syndrome… It’s called a fairy tale for a reason; it’s not real life.
At the end of my last relationship, I just threw all of my expectations in the bin. When you stop having expectations of others, you realise you can still dream, be happy and start living in the now.
No just say No
Raise your hand if you’re a yes person a people pleaser who finds it hard to say no and tries to justify yourself every time you say it.
When I started working, I said yes to every opportunity that came my way. At first, it was exciting I felt needed and useful. But people dumped more and more work on me, I became exhausted overcommitted resentful and started to make mistakes.
One of the best things about getting older is to realise that saying no to what people are asking of you is saying yes to what you want.
Resist absentminded busyness
Enjoy the simple things. It might sound simplistic, but we currently live glued to our smartphones, TVs and tablets and forget to unplug and just enjoy the things that make life worth living. Pay attention to the world, feed a squirrel, dance, be creative or do manual activities.
“Life is short don’t miss it”.
So do you think you’ve got it all planned and covered?
I thought so too, and then I took a ride into reality, and I’ve been confronted to change ever since. I did not handle it well at first, but then I got the knack of it, and now I enjoy it. Life has its way to show you your strength and potential. So my advice is embrace change, dance with it and Live the questions.
“We travel not to escape life, but for life not to escape us.” – Anonymous
Money can buy you things or memories. You can make purchases that will end up in a cupboard within two months or spent your money on one new destination each year. Travelling is nothing less than transformational. The people you meet will teach you about yourself, spirituality, generosity, simplicity and difference. Travelling is experiencing freedom, it’s educational, it broadens your views, opens your heart and teaches you acceptance.
Forgive yourself and others
I lived part of my life bitter and angry about a few events that happened to me, and for a while, I was convinced it was the other person’s fault. One day I realised that unforgiveness was keeping me hostage of my past and holding me back from happiness, so I made a change. It took time, but I was able to work through it and experience freedom. When you let go of past hurts made by yourself or others, you see life and love in a different and positive light.
Life helped me realise I enjoy helping others. Giving part of your time to help others is incredibly beneficial and rewarding. It keeps you humble, grounded and grateful for what you already have. My mentor always ends his coaching sessions with this saying “today do something good something positive for someone, do it in a way that they can never repay you” JJ.
Working versus Living
I know so many people that are stuck in jobs they hate just to get a paycheck, that’s not an ideal existence.
2013 – 15 were my rock bottom years. I felt like a failure, hated my job as a manager in retail and everything related to it. I was exhausted by the overtime, the long hours spent commuting and “rewarded” with a crappy salary. This environment was conflicting with my values, my desire of serving others, my independence, my creativity and need for expression. I was tired of the restrictions that came with a 9 to 5 job.
In 2016 I took a leap of faith into online business and digital entrepreneurship. I was a total novice with zero experience. I discovered a world I did not know existed.
Why Digital Business?
I came across a marketing system and training platform called Six Figure Mentors that prepared me for every aspect of online entrepreneurship from laying a solid foundation to gaining financial security and mindset.
That meant a freedom that comes with the benefit of not having a boss, no more reporting to superiors up the food chain of the corporate structure or being harassed by bosses you don’t agree with.
As a digital business owner, you are the boss. Being the boss means you are not only limited by the demands of your superiors, but you are not constrained by an actual office either. You can work where you want and when you want, whether it’s from your sofa or an exotic location.
As a digital business entrepreneur, you have the incomparable thrill of freedom. Freedom to make your decisions and do things the way you want them. Freedom to work when you want and to make what you want. Compare this to an office that has set times, set pay and no flexibility, and you can see why freedom is one of the biggest draws of self-employment.
Is 2017 Your Bold Year
Next time you find yourself wavering between the decision to hold on to your traditional job or venture into the world of digital entrepreneurship, remember that while it is okay to be fearful of the risks involved, there are also great rewards to be had for those who are willing to take the plunge.
If you think digital entrepreneurship is not for you and haven’t found your path yet go and test what’s out there. Try different roles, do volunteering work and find what fits you best. Find what fires you up and makes you jump out of bed with eagerness.
If like me you want to start on a journey with an incredible community of entrepreneurs that has the potential to help you become successful in so many ways. You can access, a world-class marketing platform, excellent training, and a dedicated support team to assist you.
You DESERVE the great passive income only the Internet can create!
The GOOD NEWS is this – digital business is MADE for the skills we women possess!
Brain Power 🙂
Anything less than happiness is not worth wasting your life.
CYNTHIA SERRA NEVES – Female Experience: What does it mean really? – BACK TO TOP